Listening to the song Confessions of a Broken Heart sung by Lindsey Lohan, it makes me think of my relationship with God and how my heart has never truly been whole. Its always been broken! The reason its never been whole is because I've never allowed my heart to ever heal or to deal with IT!
But then daughter to father... why did you allow this to happen to me! did you ever "love me..." I wait for the postman to bring me a letter!
Were you there when I was perverted? Were you there when I was introduced to pornography? Were you there when I had thoughts of a being a lesbian? Do I even think I should do what this world expects me to do and marry a man? The one living being I will never trust or love? The one living thing that could never be trusted with loving a woman and then loving their daughter as if it was truly precious?
I'M WAITING FOR AN ANSWER!!!! WAITING FOR THE POSTMAN THAT WILL NEVER COME!!! My emotions have been talking LOUD and I can't hide them anymore... and yes maybe I am being lead by other unseen things. But these unanswered questions I cannot allow to be unanswered anymore!
I lived a life where I never question anything but myself... Not anymore! I will question the one thing that has always been bunging me... Why and How could you allow this to happen to me and to many of the little girls out there that cry themselves into a sleep hoping its all a dream and that it never happened!
I can't hold this back anymore! My faith seems to fail me day by day and I allow it to...
..........THESE are my confessions of a broken heart! Daughter to Father... I don't know you... do I still want to...
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