to this day i still have not allowed myself to grieve for this momentous occasion. just like everyone else i remember exactly where i was. i remember my mother coming home from work screaming and walling and woke me up in hysterics. my heart was basically in my head. i turned on the tv and watched in shock as the twin towers/world trade centers were gone and up in flames.
i don't know if this is the year i will let it affect me or if i will let it truly sink in. it saddens me to see my skyline and not see them in it. i still remember what it looked like from the top floors. i ate in their restaurant there, went up the elevators, looked down at the world from atop it, and stood at the corner of the buildings.
i've yet to go see the demolished site. i've yet to pay my respects for those that died that day. it might be too much for my heart to take in. i'm not sure. but i don't want to shed that tear until i can see the true pain of its emptiness. until i can see the deep holes those buildings left behind.
i need to be in a spot where many people ran away from it. i need to stand where others watched in utter amazement of the destruction of these buildings. then that is when i can release my anger, my pain, my sorrow, and all the anguish this world carried that day and those that followed when many searched for those that were lost!
but for now i will reserve my tears for this october. i'm going home. i'm going back to new york to visit and hopefully that is one stop i will make. one stop i will grieve. but for now i will not sit and wallow. although the heaviness of this day will follow me till the day is gone.
i still remember. i will always remember. it will be etched and ingrained in my heart. thank you God for helping those that survived out of the buildings and for those that didn't i'm hoping that your love was shown in their last minutes!
i pray for those that have lost a loved one on this date. i pray that their hearts have fully been repaired and they know that they will be reiniquanted with their loved one someday!
i'm not only sharing love to those who have lost... i want to share love to you who has read this! i pray that this day is not a day of sorrow for you... but a day of love... a day that we can forgive those that maliciously decided to try and break this nation down. love them as you would love your brothers and sisters for they need it too!
~rosa
p.s. if you would like to comment on your emotions of this topic please do so... tell me your memory of this day...
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