Running Into the Unknown Abyss

Its different

Life is different

I try seeing it like I used to

I try looking at the world with my old eyes

But I can’t

I don’t remember how I used to look at it

I don’t remember how it used to be

Does it feel right

Does it feel normal

I don’t know

I’m not sure

Am I supposed to see everything differently

Am I supposed to feel the world through my eyes

Or by each step I take

What if I want to close my eyes at each step

What if I want to go at it without holding myself back

I want to run into the abyss with my hands on either side of me

With my eyes wide shut

I don’t know if this is what happiness comes from

I don’t know if this is where I tell the world forget what you know

Remember me for what you see now

Remember me for what I am now

That skin

Those eyes

That smile

Have all gone

Have been lost

And I have found a new twinkle for my eyes

I have found a new way to stand

A new way to live

Are you afraid of all this new-ness

Are you afraid that I will come to a standing halt

That I may have reached my highest peak

Oh world why must you worry for me

Why must you think that this difference is just passing

That it will not last

Why must you think the worse of my situation

Do you not see the worst part was my past

That I was able to get through that ugly jungle

That I am transformed and can’t lie in that tangle darkness

I don’t know if its right

But who cares

Mistakes are mine

Let me learn from them

And let me be changed by them